I had a hard time selecting a picture this week but what it came down to was this one and one of Andrew playing violin at his recital. Thankfully both captured the idea I was looking for– you’ve gotta take risks. You’ve gotta put yourself out there and do what feels uncomfortable sometimes. You absolutely, positively, must take chances.
Too bad I’m the one who needs this lesson more than my kids.
Andrew is a worrier like me. But at the same time he doesn’t question some things and I find myself wanting to protect him but I know sometimes it’s better for him to just try and see what happens. I came across an article this week which was posted by a friend on Facebook. It goes with a long string of books and articles I’ve read in the last few years about not raising your kids to be wusses who are unprepared for the real world. Raising them in a bubble and protecting them for every harm and injustice– it’s just what moms are ingrained to do. But if we take a step back, worry less about self-esteem and ego and let them take their own chances we really are preparing them better for the future.
So when Andrew wanted to jump down all the very large concrete steps, I held back the urge to stop him and instead said “Jump higher so I can take a picture!”
And last night when he was nervous before his violin recital I didn’t say “that’s okay you don’t have to” or “let me help you”. I said “go up there and do what you know how to do!” And when he was done I didn’t tell him he was perfect or the best student out there or even that his playing was beautiful (um, sorry, it wasn’t). I told him how proud I was that he got up there in front of everyone.
I can only hope we both learned a few things: sometimes when you take a chance instead of failing, you learn to fly.
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